Hi all of you bridal babes! Well, I've officially been wedding planning with you all for 10 months now and WOW... this is fun?
Who am I kidding... while wedding planning has been fun, interesting, exciting, etc... above all, it is STRESSFUL. You know what I'm talking about. The stress of the budget, the stress of finding vendors you love, then finding out they are not available on your date. The stress of making everyone around you happy (despite it being YOUR day). The stress of keeping track of it all and balancing everything and ensuring everyone is on the same page... ya'll... it's A LOT.
And on top of it, for those of you have been following along since the beginning, you may know the timeline of new stressors that all started last spring. If not, I'll break it down for you:
May 5, 2018: I took, my first 24 hour trip for my first time out of the US.
May 7, 2018: Logan proposed to me after 5 years of dating. I began wedding planning.
May 15, 2018: Less than 12 hours after we landed back in KC, I went to my first day at my new job.
July 15, 2019: I launched my blog.
So with wedding planning, a new job, launching my blog, and (as of January) starting a part time gig with Bumble, on top of all my prior commitments, it's been a crazy year!
But, as I enter the last 5 months of our engagement, I feel as though I finally have a handle on the stress of it all. Well, at least as far as wedding planning is concerned. And because you all are the best babes on the planet, I want to share my top ways of handling the stress of wedding planning with you!
How to Handle Wedding Planning Stress
Use a checklist or planner to help you break down month by month tasks. I would be lying if I didn't say this was the MOST helpful thing for me! I am a list person, a post-it note person, a planner person. And so my wedding planner has been my top resource for staying on top of wedding planning, while not stressing myself by doing too much, too soon. If you're interested in seeing my planner that I custom built (including checklists, helpful resources and more), be sure to subscribe to get notifications of when I post next!
Rely on your friends, family and bridal party. I took entirely too long to ask my bridesmaids to be in my wedding and when I finally did, my entire planning changed!
Include your significant other in the planning. Logan has been a HUGE help with wedding planning this entire time. At first, I'll admit, I was nervous to hand things off to him. But by clarifying any deadlines and expectations, asking what he was most interested in helping to plan and reminding myself that this is OUR day, not MY day, he's ended up being a wonderful help. Plus, we've actually had fun planning things together. A lot more fun and a lot less stress than doing it all on my own.
Break up your tasks and set due dates for yourself. What has worked best for us is setting goals per month and accomplishing them by the end of the month. But maybe weekly tasks would work best for you? But this is SO important, especially if you are a Type A, list person like me. This is also a great way to keep your significant other engage in the process.
If your stress is budget-related, don't be afraid to negotiate! This means with vendors (nothing is completely set in stone) and with yourself! Prioritize your list of vendors/items/wedding needs and treat them according to that list.
Make time for self-care. Believe me, I know how hard balancing multiple time commitments can be and making time for yourself easily falls to the side. But this can be just what you need to feel refreshed and rejuvenated to get back on task!
Make a Plan B. If you are someone who is scared of things going wrong, prepare ahead and make a Plan B for all major wedding fiascoes!
Communicate with your loved ones. Apparently, 53% of brides cite their parents and their expectations (33% cite their in-laws) as a source of stress when wedding planning. Make sure to communicate effectively with them, include them when you can and set firm boundaries as well. This may be difficult, but you'll be thankful in the end!
Spend some quality time with your significant other. It's soooo easy to get caught up in wedding planning, get snippy with each other and maybe even forget what this whole crazy mess is all about. So maybe a date night with your significant other is all that you need to refocus on the reason you're doing this.
Remember... whether or not everything goes perfectly won't define your marriage, but how you handle it just may. YOU GUYS. Like I'm not Oprah or anything, but this is a great reminder. Like someone create a cute Pinterest graphic of this or something because it is so true! We can so easily get caught up in all of the wedding day details, but in the long run, those are just a memory from our marriage. What matters is how we handle that day, the experience we have with our significant other (and the people closest to us!) So if you ever feel stressed, and reacting to that stress, remind yourself of this.
I’m not saying that you do these 10 things and you aren’t going to be stressed - I know wedding planning is still going to be A LOT. Like a lot, a lot. But, these are some tips that I’ve received from friends and family that have really helped me through it so far. Now, as long as they can get me through these last five months, we’ll be good to go!
Comment below and tell me how you’re getting through wedding planning! What has been the most stressful part? How did you deal with it? What are you looking forward to most? I want to hear it all!
So here’s to us all getting through this, together fellow brides-to-be! Prayers to you and prayers to me!